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My mother could afford to pay for care but we couldn’t get consistent reliable care due to the pandemic. We chose a residence but even they are limited to what they can provide and in Canada if a higher level of care is required then the person needs to go to LTC which wasn’t available at the time and she ended up staying in hospital until she passed. The government offers home supports with a cookie cutter approach; not tailored to what would make staying in her home possible. PSWs [personal support workers] to help shower and dress but no service to wash dishes. She could shower, [but] she needed help with dinner and dishes or laundry. The maximum hours [funded by the] Government is 4 hours/week not enough to sustainably stay home.

[Translated] I care for my husband after a stroke and brain hemorrhage, which means he needs me around the clock. I would like to have a paid time off of one week once a year and my husband is well taken care of and does not feel “deported”. After all, by taking care of him, I save the state a lot of money!

[…] When Covid came along it destroyed very important connections that enable older people in nursing homes to keep going & stay connected, to keep hope alive – the deterioration in my Mother in just 18 months was, & still is, devastating & resulted in her recent death. All those months we were unable to be by her side & keep her going, instead she wasted away as she was unable to comprehend what was going on with Covid, yet she was aware enough to know we were no longer with her. Looking through a window trying to communicate love & care to someone with dementia & who is very confused about why you wouldn’t come inside was one of the cruelest experiences. It was terrible to witness just how much our older people are let down by lack of creative, adequate, & in my opinion humane, care options because even in times of desperation when I considered taking my Mother out of the nursing home to live with me the pain of knowing that was not possible was very heavy as I knew the reality of what it had been like 4 years previously trying to care for her – lack of adequate home help, lack of adequate services – & now along now with significantly increased care needs it would have been a recipe for crisis. I became very unwell physically when I’d been involved in her care prior to her going to live in the nursing home.”

[Translated] I have placed my mother in a nursing home due to advanced dementia. What is missing there are people who occupy themselves with the old people. […] Due to Corona and very limited visitation opportunities, loneliness is increasing. Thus all voluntary visiting services fall flat. […] As much as one pushes the models to accommodate old and young in shared apartments together, I found that my mother with advancing age – who loves her great-grandchildren very much – is simply more stressed when she is visited, it is too loud, too wild, etc.. So she doesn’t want to attend family gatherings anymore either. For a while she was very enthusiastic about the day care center in [redacted] – there she was offered everything she needed. Someone talked to her, they played and made music together, they prepared the snack together, etc. This combination between home and day care center would be IDEAL in my opinion.

[Translated] It is complicated to get help when the parent who needs it is living abroad (France) and it is impossible for him/her to live alone. Because no retirement home can be found for him/her, the only solution is to take him/her at home (in another country of the European Union)

[translated] In general, the state should take care of the financing of care services and introduce a system for quick access to emergency medical care.

[translated] You’ve made me think … I will have to come up with a plan for the future.

[Translated] There are now already too few caregivers and nothing is done about it! How will that be in 10 years ?!

[Translated] I was my husband’s caregiver for 7 years. He passed away from a rare and orphaned neurodegenerative disease (PSP). When the diagnosis was announced, we felt abandoned. Then it was very difficult to find quality help even if we paid. I retired 2 years before the legal age to continue to help him. Our last and most terrible test was to have his advance directives respected. He could no longer swallow, so he could not eat or drink. He refused the gastrostomy and wanted deep sedation. I had to fight again and again to have his wishes respected. So abandoned from beginning to end!

Both my parents died in a nursing home. I believe that had there been appropriate in-home care available outside of the hours of 9am to 5pm that my mother might have been able to live at home. As it was she suffered a severe fall at night and was admitted to hospital and declined there to the point that she required full-time care. The cost of overnight carers was exorbitantly expensive. The government should put more resources into providing high quality home care which doesn’t end at 5pm when patients are most vulnerable