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[Translated] It is complicated to get help when the parent who needs it is living abroad (France) and it is impossible for him/her to live alone. Because no retirement home can be found for him/her, the only solution is to take him/her at home (in another country of the European Union)

I have Parkinson’s Disease and I dread what the future holds for me physically and mentally.

[translated] My biggest fear is that I will be powerless to support and provide for myself. That would place my family in a difficult financial and physical situation, given that my future salary and pension will not be enough to cover all expenses.

[Translated] Children and partners should never be forced to take care of their relatives. Everyone wants to be able to live their life the way they want. It’s great that a survey like this is being done. Thank you!

[translated] The development of home care services in Romania would contribute to increasing the quality of life of Romanians and would be of great help to family doctors [general practitioners] who are overburdened with time-consuming bureaucratic tasks.

[translated] This issue [of long-term care] needs to be discussed and prioritised by the state, because the population is ageing, children are going abroad and local structures for [supporting older people] need to be improved and a concrete annual budget established. We will all reach an age when we need help.

[Translated] I was my husband’s caregiver for 7 years. He passed away from a rare and orphaned neurodegenerative disease (PSP). When the diagnosis was announced, we felt abandoned. Then it was very difficult to find quality help even if we paid. I retired 2 years before the legal age to continue to help him. Our last and most terrible test was to have his advance directives respected. He could no longer swallow, so he could not eat or drink. He refused the gastrostomy and wanted deep sedation. I had to fight again and again to have his wishes respected. So abandoned from beginning to end!

[…] When Covid came along it destroyed very important connections that enable older people in nursing homes to keep going & stay connected, to keep hope alive – the deterioration in my Mother in just 18 months was, & still is, devastating & resulted in her recent death. All those months we were unable to be by her side & keep her going, instead she wasted away as she was unable to comprehend what was going on with Covid, yet she was aware enough to know we were no longer with her. Looking through a window trying to communicate love & care to someone with dementia & who is very confused about why you wouldn’t come inside was one of the cruelest experiences. It was terrible to witness just how much our older people are let down by lack of creative, adequate, & in my opinion humane, care options because even in times of desperation when I considered taking my Mother out of the nursing home to live with me the pain of knowing that was not possible was very heavy as I knew the reality of what it had been like 4 years previously trying to care for her – lack of adequate home help, lack of adequate services – & now along now with significantly increased care needs it would have been a recipe for crisis. I became very unwell physically when I’d been involved in her care prior to her going to live in the nursing home.”

Every person in need of care must be cared for so that he or she has all the dignity required. Taking into account their limitations, they must be provided with the highest possible quality of life. This care must be provided by family members and professional staff so that their affective and assistance needs are covered.

[Translated] I have long cared for my sister and my mother, and now my husband who has cancer and is bedridden! I wish someone [could support me] for a few hours or once a few days so that I could go away once with my daughter and granddaughter or make a trip!