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[Translated] I have long cared for my sister and my mother, and now my husband who has cancer and is bedridden! I wish someone [could support me] for a few hours or once a few days so that I could go away once with my daughter and granddaughter or make a trip!

[Translated] I lost my father last year (cancer). We kept him at home, with my brothers and sister, almost until the end; we are now looking after our mother. She has been in a nursing home for several months. We take turns every day to get her up, wash her, dress her, feed her and take her out. The staff at the care home is always on leave, there is a high turnover of staff. Not only does my mother pay, we each pay a small part of the accommodation, but we are the ones who take care of her from morning to night. That’s why we are part-time.

[translated] The development of home care services in Romania would contribute to increasing the quality of life of Romanians and would be of great help to family doctors [general practitioners] who are overburdened with time-consuming bureaucratic tasks.

[translated] Well, I hope that caregivers get a protected or priority status – I mean at work and as workers, everyone needs us, our attention, and to some extent it feels like we are omnipotent and can care for others, care for ourselves and sometimes, care for our parents. That is wrong.

[Translated] I was my husband’s caregiver for 7 years. He passed away from a rare and orphaned neurodegenerative disease (PSP). When the diagnosis was announced, we felt abandoned. Then it was very difficult to find quality help even if we paid. I retired 2 years before the legal age to continue to help him. Our last and most terrible test was to have his advance directives respected. He could no longer swallow, so he could not eat or drink. He refused the gastrostomy and wanted deep sedation. I had to fight again and again to have his wishes respected. So abandoned from beginning to end!

[translated] Long-term care should be almost exclusively the prerogative of state institutions that should have the necessary infrastructure and resources to respond to the needs of older people and their families.

[Translated – excerpt] Long-term care is an obligation of society. The administration has to participate and set criteria for equality, but it has to get involved in management, if it wants to do so under the same conditions as everyone else. Give a choice to the citizen who chooses what he/she wants, not what the administration thinks (free choice). Care should be directed by the people, not only centred on them. Empowerment of the citizen. Promote professional training and above all competences and skills. Increase staff ratios and salaries, and above all work/family/leisure balance. There is a lot of work to be done.

[translated] These studies are interesting, but [I do not know] whether the obtained results will have an impact or be used by the competent institutions, in the direction of improving the situation with provision of care to the elderly… We have low incomes and therefore we do not have the opportunity to resign or pay for caregiver or nursing home services… nor do our parents have such pensions that can cover their expenses to stay in a nursing home, where they will live comfortably and be treated with dignity …

Thanks for keeping this in the public eye. No easy answers, I’m not sure I agree with all of mine today, but we must keep trying!!

[Translated] Support and training for family caregivers is needed in many ways.